Project Clambake-ry 3.12

Not satisfied with a slow death, the producers decided to treat the viewers to another NON-episode like 3.11 this week…the obligatory Reunion Show. It’s really a reunion in name only because you know these people have destroyed any hope of having a real friendship outside of the show. This recap, unlike the programme, will be mercifully short compared to previous ones as really, there was sweet FA deserving of commentary except a couple moments of complete and utter idiocy/creepiness/assholery.

First off, let’s deal with Vincent. I knew from day one when he placed that idiotic basket on his model’s head and proclaimed it ‘turned him on’ that I would never mesh with this guy’s aesthetic, or anything else for that matter. Thankfully, my hatred while appearing to be only 1% unfounded was revealed to be 1000% accurate with this lovely clip they played in episode 3.12.

Sadly, this is the most complete clip I could find and I’m too lazy to upload it. He went on to walk off the show, requesting “a mother fucking plane ticket” to presumably go home like any good kid that gets pissed at a sandbox. Yeesh.

The Gunn had a funny montage of clips, but like I explained to someone already, if you’re showing clips from the previous season and 90% of them are as yet unseen, it kind of defeats the purpose of a REUNION, doesn’t it? Urgh.

I’m sorry but mitigate, consternation, caucus, ambivalent, placate, contrivance and aggregious are pretty run o’ the mill for me…especially mitigate, placate and contrivance. I can’t believe these people in the fashion WORLD have never heard or used them before. Michael’s idiotic “huh” look when Tim uses mitigate really annoyed me as it’s the easiest of all the words presented. Makes him look really stupid, unfortunately.

Malan actually got to show at Fashion Week, which I thought was a bit of cool news…

…and he also starred in Hellraiser II after he was auf’d.

Onto the only real drama in the reunion, Keith’s appearance. For a complete rundown of the events, go here. In a nutshell, Keith had pattern books in his room and got kicked off – end of story. After a short montage showing the incident which ended in his mid-episode elimination, we got to hear Keith’s take on the situation which typically, was spun tight as can be, eliminating any responsibility on his part. Truth be told, he first tried to deny any knowledge of the rules, stating that the contract he signed said nothing about how-to books. Unfortunately, the rest of the people on the show shouted in unison, “Yes it was.” Trying another angle, he accused the producers of planting the books after already removing them from him once when he first entered the competition. The Gunn, of course, took complete offense to his unfounded claim that the producers were engaging in less than above board tactics. Turning a third time, Keith disavowed any knowledge of his statements accusing the producers of setting him up (which occured seconds earlier)…

…seriously, the guy is fucking MENTAL.

The only other point of interest in the entire reunion was the inevitable recalling of the constant bickering between Angela and Jeffrey. For her part, Angela seemed more resigned to the fact that Jeffrey was simply a prick while Jeffrey still pounded home his delusional views involving Angela and her mother’s sabotaging of his “Everyday Woman” design. Jeffrey refused to apologize and claimed that he already had. Angela rightly refuted this claim, stating that she specifically asked him to apologize to her mother – a suggestion that Jeffrey balked at, since he’s a complete assclown, as we all know.

That was it. The final four designers were introduced, everyone congratulated them and they all watched amusing clips from the previous season. Yawn.

Bring on the finale and get some more interesting people for Season 4, I say.



~ by seangstm on October 10, 2006.

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